I touched on it briefly yesterday but today I'd like to talk about it in more depth, although I am sure it will pop up again, here and there.
This is my view of healing. I have a lot of friends who desperately wish for me to be healed of my illnesses, disabilities or pain and they are quite often frustrated at my "I'm the same as yesterday" or "I'm alright" answer to their question "How are you?"
I have some really great, wonderful friends praying for my healing and trusting in the sovereignty of God.
But then there are the others, people who approach me to say to me "I have prayed long and hard about your healing, how are you feeling today?" and seem quite taken aback that I do not just jump up and do a backflip. Then sometimes they are angry and say things like "well I have done what I can do, now it is up to you to build up your faith enough to be healed"
Let me assure you that although my faith waivers and shakes at times, it is on a strong foundation of Christ, that is getting stronger everyday by God's grace alone.
I do not need to go to the Benny Hinns or Todd Bentlys of the world, I do not need to go to worldly men for my healing, let me make it quite clear, I would rejoice in being healed but I depend on God's sovereignty and grace to decide that for me. I do believe that people can be healed, I do believe that God works wonderously in this life, but He does it.
My healing or my disability have never been up to me and I will continue to leave them in God's hands. I am happy with my life and who I am and while I would make good use of pain-free days(what is that notion?), I make good use of my days where pain is my companion as well. I love God and want to follow His will and be content in His path for me.
Paul, one of Jesus' apostles, was bothered by an ailment, whether physical or spiritual that he talks about in 2 Corinthians 12:7-10
7 So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited. 8 Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. 9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 10 For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
So Paul prayed and asked God to remove the thorn three times and then he honoured God's will for him by being content. I wish the same, not to say I am anything like Paul in my faith, I have prayed many times for my healing and now I wish not to nag the Lord :) there are so many wonderful things to pray about in praise or horrible things to petition God's mercy in.
"Power is made perfect in weekness"
This is a radical concept now, to say there is power in weakness in a society that praises the smartest, fastest, bravest and most beautiful. But indeed some of the most powerful people I know or admire in terms of spiritual riches or gifts of the spirit are people that are broken and weak. If our world had a day where it payed attention, I mean REALLY noticed the "weak" (the disabled, the mentally ill, the persecuted, the jailed, the homeless, the young, the old) we would be so so so much richer.
I hope this makes sense even a tiny bit to you, if you have managed to read this far into my ramblings, pat yourself on the back!
Soli Deo Gloria.