Hi friends,
I'm currently on vacation visiting my brother and his family. He and his wife just had a baby boy June 24. My brother also has a 5 year old from a previous relationship who is visiting this week too (normally he lives with his mommy) as well.
I'm back on narcotics as pain relief, I don't like this situation much but I was very thankful for them yesterday when we went to the waterpark and I spent 2 hours splashing around with the kids (the 5 year old nephew who is my brother's son and my nephew who is 13 and niece who is 10 who are my sister's kids) and not worrying about being in too much pain, even with the activity my pain was only at a 4 or 5 instead of it's usual 8 out of 10. I have payed for it a bit today but it was fun once again being the "fun aunt" I used to be before my health declined.

So I'm at my brother's and I have to say it's pretty awesome being able to play chutes and ladders all day with a 5 year old and being able to hold a brand new baby too!
Happy Sunday!
Soli Deo Gloria
REformed girl

sleep

oh my!! last night I didn't sleep! not one moment!! not even with my usually useful sleep meds. I only got 3 hours the night before so I got up this morning at 7am and did a load of laundry and once I had put it outside on the line (we don't have a dryer, nor do we want one) I went to bed til one o'clock this afternoon.
I hope I sleep tonight!
I'm thankful for good friends who are also insomniacs who kept me company last night.
I hope they sleep tonight too!
Goodnight!
Soli Deo Gloria
REformed girl

the reinvention of me

So it's been really hard for me the past few months, I had to stop working in October due to my health and my profession (as an assistant who cares for and supports 6 people with developmental disabilities in a live in capacity, kind of what I would assume is similar to a housewife but with pay, reportedly not a well-paying job for the amount of work required but something I can throw my heart into as I have no family of my own) was my life and my everything. I have been pleasantly surprised with just how much the people I work with (both the clients and the staff) have become my family of sorts. I have remained a close and respected member of the household, I visit often but I miss them all terribly and the loss of my identity has remained like a steady toothache (or maybe I should compare it, more appropriately, to my chronic pain which is always with me) so that I find myself reinvented.


So what am I?


A Christian, a sister, a daughter, a friend, an enemy, an old woman, a lover, an artist, a strong woman, a weak person, extraordinary, a person who is disabled, not neurotypical, a craftsperson, a child, a smile, a ?, ordinary

beautiful

broken


His.


Soli Deo Gloria

REformed anon girl

baby's back!

just wanting to let y'all know in cyberland that I'm back!

a few weeks ago I lost an entire week because of a medication reaction but during my brief lucid moments, I remembered and thought fondly of this blog and decided it was time to get back on this horse. I can't possibly update you as to what has gone on in the past few months/year but I'll do what I can to fill in some gaps tomorrow and for the coming weeks.

Thanks for your continued prayers, my fine friends.
Soli Deo Gloria
REformed anon girl in pain

pray

Please pray for me, I'm having a lot of issues with pain and coping.
thank you.
I hope to be up to blogging again soon but tonight, I'm just trying to cope.

Soli Deo Gloria

invisible

This is a poem I wrote a while ago, it's from one of my days where my disability is invisible (aka no mobility aides) I was being mistreated by a staff at the train station.

you see me
but do you?
to your eyes
how do i look?
young girl with pink hair
a little dumb
flustered and shy
never giving eye contact
but do you know me
before you throw me
to the ground
and stomp on me
did you know?
I don't see like you do
did you even think
that something might
be wrong?
did you know?
I don't think like you do
I'm not stupid
just different
did you know?
I'm important in someones life
not just another useless youth
although not one person is useless
did you know?
that God loves you
and I forgive you
for your ignorance
did you know?
I cried today
because of your mistreatment
not because of physical pain
but the pain of being labeled
as stupid once again
by someone who doesn't know
that I am not invisible
only my disabilities are

i hath returned!

I haven't blogged in a long time, lots to do, many vacations and travels, stemming all from the need to see a specialist 6 hours away from my home. Some people may see it as a hastle to have to travel that far away for a 30 minute appointment but I got a lot of joy out of it. I visited with many friends and had a great time!
I've been thinking about how lucky I am, that God would see fit to be in this life of mine that is total shambles, totally depraved and totally sinful and use it, truly use it, for His Glory. that is my highest wish.
I have felt in the past that I do not know enough about the bible to be a proper Christian, but God is so good to have put people in my life for the betterment and encouragement of myself.
I am deeply thankful for a virtual game called Second Life, because it has truly changed me in that the people I have met and the good news that has been shared with me in a forum that I never thought possible. I have learned things from some of my friends on Second Life that I never would have thought I would be interested in!
I'm becoming a deeper person, a more educated person and it's all because of a "game"!
God is so good and He never ceases to amaze me in what he uses to get things into this thick little skull of mine.
I never thought it would be in a game though!